this update is brought to you by the letter “B”

Well, that and procrastination. But that doesn’t count.

B-athroom, B-eethoven, B-aby, B-irthday, B-ad news

First, there is the ongoing saga that is my Bathroom.
What began as dirt in my sink and continued with replacing the sewage pipe eventually culminated in the dismissal of our worker. After a month of inconsistent work, careless choices, tardiness and random absence, I took the risk of ending a work relationship with someone who still had a sizable portion of our money. It did not go smoothly or end well and now I have to deal with the courts. Worse than that really is the drawn out nature of the project and the fact that we haven’t had fully functional plumbing since this all began the second week of March. The drama of it all has dominated my head space and made me crazy. The “do-it-yourself” portion has taxed my body and what remained of my mind.

Then we have a little Beethoven.
A dear friend and local professor was diagnosed with a very grave illness around the same time the plumbing went to hell. In addition to the worry and concern for Doc and his family, I was given the opportunity to pick up his courses as an adjunct at the college mid-semester. I have to say it has been a blessing to feel like there has been something productive I can do in such a frustrating situation where all anyone wants to do is help but where there is little anyone can do but wait for medical treatment to do its magic. So, I have been teaching some music history, ya’ll.
All that’s left this semester is to administer the final exams.

Finally this weekend we had Baby and Birthday.
Unfortunately, I had to miss celebrating Miss Meghan’s birthday on Saturday. The happy bit of that is that the reason was so that I could go be part of a lovely party to honor Baby Norah Belle’s imminent arrival with her mama Heather, our friend Natalie and all the other amazing women in her life. Heather’s sister, friend and mother all rocked it out to create a unique shower. We had a girl’s night with the best food and drink you can imagine and activities that involved singing and creating art. There wasn’t a microwaved candy bar in a diaper in sight! As for Meghan, Lady of El Cinco de Mayo, I missed the party but did get to squeeze the hangover out of her on Sunday. Well, I don’t think I was successful at that—but there was a hug and there WILL be more partying this week.

After my month (or so) of trauma and my weekend of recovery, there was a little more Bad News.
Cherí lost her Sugar Baby while I was gone. My friend has had a sweet lovely pet horse for most of her life, through all bad times and lots of good, too. Pets provide stability and the best kind of listening ear—one that doesn’t come with interruptions or judgment. The worst thing (I imagine) about a pet that has such a long life is that it gives you time to grow that much more attached and unable to imagine a life where that comfort isn’t there.

So while I wish for completion in our home improvement, I also send Strength to Doc and Cherí with lots of Happy to Heather and Meghan!

“real” writers

They probably organize their thoughts to sit down and write.
Well, this chick is sitting down to organize her thoughts through writing.
Sue me.
Fire me.
Shoot me.

Today I had the day off.
But I have been up since seven and being wildly productive ever since.
It’s unusual and somewhat satisfying and exhausting.

The last few weeks have been a roller coaster that only plummets, which I realize isn’t really much of a roller coaster . . . but yea.

The plumbing has taken over every spare bit of energy and in the rare moment of freedom, well, I just feel restless.

You know what is gonna help?

A new gym membership and an unnecessary purchase of workout clothes in an impossible but fun throwback 80’s palette.

I blame my guilty pleasure addiction to The Carrie Diaries.

Returning to Winter

This was not a vacation I was eager to return from.
I had brief moments of “I miss my bed” and “I miss my dogs”
but mostly a lot of “I want to stay in the South.”

The trip received some built in adventure.
My grandfather, who lived in St. Petersburg, was hospitalized on Christmas and died on New Year’s.
It was both fortune and misfortune that we were leaving for holiday 2 days later. . . It felt odd to have to soak in so much enjoyment, but was a blessing I would be there to clean out the apartment, etc.

The short version is: there was DISNEY, an adventure in grieving and piecing together a mysterious man’s life, and a couple days of bliss in St. Augustine.

While in Florida, we enjoyed warmer than average temps— above 80 all but a couple days and then returned just before a freak snow and a cold snap which has this mountain winter wind falling below zero. That transition is a little more extreme than I would like.

I might enjoy unpacking a story here and there,
but for now you can check out ye old instagram for a few of the highlights of the month we were gone!

Yes, I saw Les Miserables.

I am pretty certain my opinion matters little in the world of “what people think of the Les Miserables film.” Those who care have their own fierce thoughts and feelings, no doubt.

A tiny bit of history. Mine. With the musical. I heard about the musical back in 1985. Being 10 years old before the internet, my link to the theatre world was through magazines. At the college library there was one magazine on the technical aspects of the theatre and one for educators. I read them. Thoroughly. A tiny column in the tech mag mentioned a stunning, game changing design being prepared for a try out at the Barbican. When it opened in London I read more in the same magazine about John Napier’s crazy famous twisty turny barricade. I searched obscure catalogs and managed to get a copy of the concept recording (from way back in 1980) sometime between its opening in London and the Broadway previews. And probably because it was available first, I had the London cast on cassette.
So yes, I still sing all the songs in a thick Cockney.
It took me years to understand phrases like "sold her hair" and "see each other plain." By 1989 I had a copy of "The Complete Les Miserables" book which solved all these woes as it included a full libretto. At some point they also published the first contemporary unabridged version of the novel which had the musical cover art on the front. These were the tools to begin a proper obsession. It was that blessed "complete" book that made me aware of international versions of musicals. A dangerous thing for a budding costumer. So much to research! Then it wasn’t long until the "Complete Symphonic Recording" was released. 1990. I was in high school and had (OOOooooh) a cd player now. This recording spoiled me. I wanted every musical to release recordings this thorough. Ummm. Dream on, freakish child. At any rate, now I could actually learn all of the roles I would ever play (or not) AND sing them in even more bizarre accents– since this was an international recording. You should know, Eponine is almost unintelligible. Thank God I already had that libretto! Now all you need to know is that, until Spring Awakening came along, Les Miserables was the show I had seen most in professional settings (London, Broadway and National Tours.) I think I have seen it around 17 times, many of those before it was hacked down from 3 hours and 15 minutes.

Sorry, sweet mary, I haven’t even gotten to the movie.
Okay, let’s just talk performances.

I was blessed to see it early (with some very special people!) and have had a couple days to let my brain settle. Many of my thoughts are formed around the opinions of others. Like "OMG Russell Crowe sucks." Yea, so what? Somebody had to, I figure. It’s a movie. They cast actors. They hope they can carry a tune, even if it is a freakin’ opera. It’s irresponsible, but sells tickets. Meh. The most egregious misstep was that he was a tepid Javert. And that might not even have been his fault. They clearly directed him to be too sympathetic. That shit with him pinning his badge on Gavroche? (Also WHY did this happen during the dead student music. This is where I want to get emotional seeing the dead adolescents, not having a tender moment with the bad guy?!!!) Anyway, it doesn’t exactly help him stay in villain camp. I don’t need him to be complex. For crying out loud. I need him to be mean. And hell, Norm Lewis is a god among us and he was a wussy Javert, too. So anyway, Russell. His singing? It was not enjoyable which was distracting, but for me more because he didn’t have a terrible instrument– he just didn’t seem properly trained. His diction was a mess. Hire somebody, people. But his lack of energy wasn’t just in his singing. I don’t know whose bad decision it was, so I just ignored him. Until he hit the concrete and sounded like a sack of chicken bones getting stomped on. Then I involuntarily sqawked. Ew. And I think it was followed by some crap editing, if I remember correctly. Oh, but before I leave our "pathetic but not the ruiner everyone is making him" Javert– The Confrontation kicked ass. He actually sounded good.

I don’t think I need to chatter much about Anne Hathaway. It was excellent. It helped that they moved "I Dreamed A Dream" to a more emotionally charged place in the show. I kind of never want to play Fantine unless they find a way to make that possible in the stage version. Like, totally not fair.

Hugh Jackman mostly sounded quite good. I was never horrified. And frankly, I loved his Valjean so much (youngish and skinny though he was) that he kind have could have sucked a little and I wouldn’t have cared. He’s got some funny placement that sometimes thrills me and is surprising in a good way, but sometimes sounds like a tiny tenor leprechaun is trapped behind his face.

Amanda Seyfried sounds like a bird, but it’s Cosette, so whatever.
Young Cosette sang the least annoying “Castle on a Cloud” ever though. And that little West End Gavroche was spunky. lol

The jury seems out on Eddie Redmayne, but he can do no wrong in my book. I was shocked by how good he sounded. Though he moved a little too much at times.
Anyway, his idea to start Empty Chairs” a capella?
Mad credit to you, dude.
And his acting in that song alone made him the most interesting Marius has EVER been for me.

The people I really cared about– the stage veterans.

Oh wait. Before I get there. The Thenardiers.
I had fear when I first saw their demented elf-like costumes. I had greater fear when I heard the highlights recording. It all made sense when I saw it. Loved that it was set at Christmas. Was less bothered by both actors than ever before. And it was funny. I saw why they made the choices vocally and it didn’t make me mad. Good enough. I didn’t really like that Mme did her entire verse as a lap dance, "but, what can you do?"
I mean, there is no audience to play to in a film, so all is forgiven.

So yea, Aaron Tveit.
Even with that cocker-spaniel-scalp on your head you were beautiful. Well, you sounded dynamo, and that’s what I came for really. Enjrolas, you do not disappoint. This is also where I start really liking the changes that they made going back to the book. Grantaire coming and choosing to be executed with his "foil" Enjrolas after everyone else is gone? Absolutely perfect, thank you.

And shot by West End sensation Hadley Fraser– why couldn’t they have just let him be Javert. *le sigh* Alas, they gave the "lesser known" token spots to Aaron and Samantha.

But Hadley was beyond awesome as the Army Captain– "You at the barricades, listen to this!"

Fra Fee is Courfeyrac and then they went and plucked Provaire straight from the concert. Alistair Brammer in the house!
Killian Donnelly is Combeferre. (And he gets to carry his "dead" RL girlfriend away from the barricade. AWW. ? lol)

Former Gavroche, Adam Searles and former Cosette, (I think from the 25th concert) Katie Hall were extras.

I also glimpsed former Eponines, Gemma Wardle and Caroline Sheen and my girl, Linzi Hateley!

Bertie Carvel (who won an Olivier for Parade). . .
was ONE MEAN Bamatabois.

Speaking of mean– that foreman? Yikes. Get it, Michael Jibson. (Who happens to be married to the aformentioned Caroline Sheen. Ain’t Broadway/West End an incestuous little place?)

Thenardier’s gang looked familiar but I haven’t placed them yet . . .

Joly looked familiar, too . . .

Oh!
And I laughed when the random man I dubbed "Colonel Sanders" appeared out of nowhere. He looked familiar because he was DaVinci in Ever After.
But why the hell did we suddenly need Marius’ rich ass grandfather to bust in?

Other "from the book" excitement?
Eponine hiding the letter and throwing herself in front of the bullet/ Gavroche delivering Marius’ letter to Valjean.
And Gavroche’s elephant!!!!!
I got very excited by these happy little changes.

I had less care than I thought that they used Frances Ruffelle (original Eponine) as a whore. Nice. But I didn’t care as much as others did. Even more surprising? Because I was obsessed when she got cast? Samantha Barks. I was just way too sad at the lack of belting. I know why. Movie. Acting. BLAHBLAHBLAH. I still love her, but a girl can grieve.

Know what I DIDN’T see? Cameron Macintosh and Claude-Michel Schönberg . They were in there somewhere dammit.

I’m gonna need a bootleg. Or see it a bajillion times in the theatre.

Anything else in particular anybody wants to know?

Gathering

Christmas is approaching.
This is definitely the downhill ride into the depth of the holiday.

A week that I anticipated would be full of solitude and quiet,
turned out to be full of feasts and friends.
Not a terrible trade. But it took some adjustment.

And now, I have to gather my thoughts and feelings all together.

I was blessed to still take time each day to savor my experiences,
using Rachel Cole’s mini-course, Sensual Holiday, to settle into my senses and contemplate each day.

For the Solstice I attended a party and enjoyed treats and conversations.

On the first day of Winter, it snowed.
And Kevin and I went on a holiday date with my parents.
More food. More love and light through the dark, cold.

And finally, we took a day trip to Baltimore—our Christmas present to ourselves—to see the musical, Billy Elliott, in the beautiful Hippodrome Theatre. We had amazing pub food, watched a show through giggles and tears, and did a little shopping on the home.

The week and my belly have both been totally stuffed and it feels good slow down again.
Who am I kidding? More friends tonight—holiday fun and Les Miserables goodness. Christmas Eve with carols and family.
Cooking dinner Christmas Day. Packing for our 2-in-1 vacation.
Off to the in-laws. A jaunt into southern WV.
Lots more friends to see.
And beyond that lies vacation—Disney World in the New Year!

So life is not really settling, but for now my mind and body are.
And that is enough.

more grounded

When everything feels out of control and a bit too chaotic,
getting out my “fancy” camera grounds me.
Whether it is the observer’s distance gained
with a lens between me and the world,
or the reflective act of sorting through the photos afterward,
or a combination of the two sides
of a photographer’s coin . . .
I am not sure.

But I feel calmer.

And able to embrace the holiday,
even amidst the pain and suffering and loss
present in the past couple of days.

 

Finals week! Graduating!

So in my insanity, I decided to do a Masters program in a year.
And that year ends Friday.

3 of my 4 finals are done—and graded. I finally feel like I can begin to relax and celebrate. (Though this last one is a doozy.)

Maybe I can also begin to feel more in the mood for Christmas.

I am not decorating much this year, but I had intended to do the porch lights. But that hasn’t happened yet. If I wait much longer maybe I will just do lights a la photoshop.

Recently I posted a picture of my favorite collection of Christmas stories—my mom’s from the 1950’s. It was a Whitman publication. I have discovered since that a large percentage of my childhood memories are tied to their products.

This includes a paper nativity scene that I remembered the other day. So I tracked one down on ebay. Happy Christmas to me!

I haven’t eaten a bite today

Aside from the headache brewing from a combination of no food, no caffeine and hormones, it feels great to be empty. I haven’t felt the pangs of hunger in at least a week and was starting to fear I would be unable to break the overeating spree. But turns out my body is totally on board with a serious detox bordering on fast.

We had good visits over Thanksgiving with the promise of even more around Christmas.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It felt amazing to grab some presents at the book fair and stroll the farmer’s markets to bring home some of my favorite honey. (Oh and some lovely holiday tea, which got left behind!!!! It’s a regular tea rapture and mine didn’t make it. ahhhhhh!)

I have, quite sadly, decided not to bring out my usual flock of trees this holiday. With exams and travel, I don’t want to add what might feel like a burden or work to my season. So, I am seeking relaxing alternatives to a living room holiday makeover. And it might be a strand of homemade garland, a few lights, and a winterscape on top of the entertainment center.

As much end of semester work as I have, today shall be spent in holiday recovery, making lists and watching cheesy movies and maybe reading some stories tonight by a candle with a mug of tea. I bought a duplicate copy of a book from my mom’s childhood. It’s still my most-favorite.

contentment

I haz it.

This semester I have been a giant ball of stress,
to the point of physical illness.

Despite that, I am fully satisfied. Wishes 100% fulfilled.

I am doing my gratitude work this holiday privately,
but this is the summary.

I have chosen and continue to choose happiness every day.

Snow at Halloween ~ Take 2

For the second year in a row I have had a very old fashioned sort of birthday.
This year Hurricane Sandy came to visit and borrowed our power for some time.

We huddled under piles of afghans, comforters and blankets.
Just before lunch on my birthday, yesterday, the lights and more importantly, the heat, returned.

With trick-or-treating postponed, yesterday didn’t feel quite festive enough.
So I uploaded pictures from my childhood birthdays and Halloweens.
It helped. This costume? Totally built around my insistence on wearing a tiara.
True story.

And now, after one last birthday dinner of indulgence,
I am settling in to read seasonal digital magazines.

And considering today’s prompt for
30 Days of Thanks . . .