Killing time

Standard

I figure I might as well write something while I wait for some virus searches to complete. I am cleaning up a friend’s computer.

I went to work today. There are days when my job is incredibly rewarding. I am lucky to be paid anything for some of the beautiful moments I get to witness. But it is exhausting and has not been very fulfilling lately. It is lonely. I mean, I get to be with people, but I am helping them and don’t often have anyone on “my side” of things to share anything with.

Complaint #1 issued. hahahha

The summer is having its ups and downs already.
The musical review we just finished went well and I am glad for that.
We just helped Jordan move into his new apartment.
And Rachel is off to Europe today for crying out loud in the dark.
There is a lot of transition and even when its mostly good it can be destabilizing.
I feel rather ungrounded.
Despite thinking the best thing to do for that feeling is to settle in, relax, develop ritual, stay put . . .
I just want to run and travel.

Oh and notes from the universe have their days, so before I forget to save this one:

“One of the most stringent conditions all angels must meet…is that they must not allow themselves to feel hurt or rejected by the choices made by others, no matter how much they’ve done for them nor how great their love.”

Because, holy damn, if I could only internalize that once and for all, how different my life (on the inside) would be.

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