Your wishes came true–
well okay, the ones you sent to me
wishing me a happy birthday.
and i want to thank everyone.
whether i read a sweet comment from you,
heard your voice over the phone
or was blessed with spending real time with you yesterday;
you must know it meant everything.
long ago i gave up the need for any holiday or special event to be “perfect,”
or to include hearing from every possible person in my life.
that isn’t meant to sound defeatist–
because not only is that impossible, but it is often unfair to everyone–
i was always unsatisfied and those who truly did make an effort were never fully appreciated.
i guess it wasn’t so long ago, as it really began six years ago with my wedding.
i looked at what weddings had become to people and feared the stress of creating such a stressful event.
so i sent postcards into the world. invited anyone and everyone.
i honestly have no idea how many people were there . . . but it was not excessive or extravagant.
rather than making me sad that i could invite everyone in the world and have less than 100 people respond,
i truly felt a divine presence in the world, maybe for the first time.
i trusted; trusted that it would be exactly what it needed to be and would be perfect for that moment in my life.
it was, as have all my birthdays, christmases and special days since.
it’s amazing how damaging expectations can be.
it is so freeing to (instead of worrying about what/who is missing)
take each greeting or gift and spend a moment being grateful for it,
sending all my love and energy to the person
who also spent time and love
to give that to me.
i will cross-post this and pray that all of you who took that extra effort to give me a great day
will read it and know it was appreciated,
i love you all.